2/14/2022 0 Comments How Adult Content Can Lower Self Esteem and Set Unrealistic Expectations For SexSinger Billie Eilish recently revealed in an interview with Howard Stern that she used to watch a lot of pornography when she was a teen stating, "I started watching porn when I was, like, 11…I think it really destroyed my brain and I feel incredibly devastated that I was exposed to so much porn."
She later commented on how it affected her, saying, "The first few times I, you know, had sex, I was not saying no to things that were not good. It was because I thought that's what I was supposed to be attracted to." Eilish describes a larger part of how pornography can negatively affect people's views on sex and self-image, not only for impressionable young people but also for adults. A lot of people turn to pornography as their exposure to sex. While adult content is often used for pleasure, it can set unrealistic expectations for sex, your partner, and you. Depending on the type of adult content someone may view, porn can damage your self-image by comparing your body to the performers in the videos, making you feel inadequate. This, in turn, can lower your self-image by giving yourself unrealistic body standards. It can also give people unrealistic expectations on how sex is supposed to be by creating performance anxiety and whether you're living up to the high energy produced in the videos. By comparing sex with how it's presented in porn, you can also become self-conscious and insecure about your sexual performance and whether you or your partner are measuring up. In addition, it can generate judgment for not just yourself but how you view your partner's body and performance. Like Eilish mentioned, depending on what type of porn you are viewing, it can send bad messages and make you believe that your partner may want to do certain things they are uncomfortable with. One thing that's important to know is that pornography is fantasy. It still uses the same tricks that all productions use. The magic of editing can make two people appear to be going at it for hours. The people in the videos are actors who exaggerate their pleasure to create the illusion of mind-blowing sex. Some people watch pornography, and some people don't. But it's important to know that it's still a performance to heighten the viewer's pleasure. Pornography is easy to access with the internet, and unfortunately, as Eilish later mentions in her interview, "I feel angry now at how much I saw, how easy it was to watch it". She does make a good point; it's very easy for young people to access pornography online, and just like Billie Eilish, it can warp your view of what sex really represents. Sex and pornography are taboo subjects, but sex education in school and talking about it are meaningful ways to teach young people that pornography - like film and television - is a production and does not reflect reality or the consensual relationship to bond people.
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No matter how busy I may be in my everyday life, I always try my best to maintain my ongoing relationships and friendships. After all, having those friends by your side is one of the best aspects of life, but sometimes those relationships may only be surface level and there might not be too much behind it.
What does it mean to have a toxic friendship? The reality is that a lot of friendships you have, may not be filled with the same love and depth that you have with your best friend. Some are only meant to be surface level, and that’s fine, however what happens when that surface level friendship starts to drain you? It can be hard to see what’s good for you sometimes, especially when the relationship you have with someone is just platonic. Too many of us put up with too much because the pain that certain relationships bring us scares us less than the pain of letting go of people we love. We also have a tendency to deny toxic relationships or friendships because that toxic environment and behaviour is something we have gotten used to before. Here are some signs to look out for if you feel like your friendship has become toxic: If you feel yourself being unhappy with a friend's behaviour or how things have been lately, you may be involved in a toxic friendship. Here are some signs to look for:
The worst part of realizing that you have a toxic friend is that he/she may be someone to whom you were once much closer but from whom you have drifted. Friend breakups can be just as painful as romantic relationships especially when you realize the friendship is not serving you in a healthy way. Constantly making up excuses for this type of friend can easily build resentment towards them and make you look at them in a worse way, which is not healthy for either side. The best thing to do when confronted with this situation is to sit down with your friend and openly discuss all issues you both have; if both of you wish to continue the friendship, there will be effort and progress. Point blank: You don’t need toxic people in your life, whether people are telling you they are toxic or you believe that on your own, creating your own happiness without having that extra weight on top of your everyday life is something you want to shoot for. Don’t guilt yourself for cutting off something that isn’t serving you anymore, especially if it's creating anxiety and mental health problems. Remember, there was a time you lived before that person and you can do it again without them. But here’s the catch, if the relationship is heading south, it may also be time for you to look within and see if you were problematic during the friendship. If you don’t realize any of these toxic traits in your friend, maybe it’s time to take a hard look in the mirror and see what you could be doing wrong. Are you a supportive friend or a distant friend? Or are you a talker or a listener? Or are you a fighter or a lover? Being in your 20's can be challenging. You're still young and hopeful, but you're also experiencing your first real taste of adulthood. Of course, nobody expects you to know all the answers, but here are some things you can invest yourself in to help you in the long run.
Learn to Budget It's never too early to learn the importance of getting savvy with your money, especially when it comes to budgeting your finances. Take the amount of money you make and manage how to break it up between bills, food, clothes, and how much to put aside for those "treat yourself" purchases. Many banking apps have features that can help you do this to help you live within your means. Once you do, you can start taking control of your money and planning for your future. Learn Something New Even though you might be done with school, that doesn't mean you should be done with learning. Whether you're learning a new skill, like woodworking or cooking, or educating yourself on social issues, take this time to learn as much as you can, even if it's just watching a documentary on Netflix. You can make it easy by learning something new with a friend. Attend community events and groups These events can be get-together with people sharing common interests, hobby groups, game nights, and volunteering with others for a good cause; the possibilities are endless. Find a group that gets together weekly or participate in more community events to meet new people and become more social. Who knows, it might lead to something bigger. Surround Yourself with a Strong Support System Surrounding yourself with a solid group of people who will support your aspirations and goals is the key to success. You can also use this time to leave negativity and negative people behind. Don't be afraid to let them go. Start getting out there and building up your network by becoming more active in your community, surrounding yourself with positive support, and continuing your learning. This will help start you on a good foundation for future success. 1/17/2022 0 Comments Learn To Appreciate YourselfIn some ways, pride may not be generally viewed as a positive thing. But there is a big difference between boasting and self-confidence. Remember, it’s so important for us to support ourselves throughout our journey of self-love and happiness. Although taking pride in yourself should never be viewed as bad, learning to have self-appreciation can be easier said than done.
If you are struggling to implement self-appreciation into your life, you can take some steps to make this happen. Start with the little things: Look at your day. Is there something small that you did within your day that you can take pride in? Whether it’s washing the dishes, finishing that big assignment, or even getting out of bed, those are all accomplishments within themselves. Even a small victory can be a good one. Practice Positive Projection: Take a look at someone you deeply admire. What is it about them that you admire? What do they bring to the table that you wish you had? Write down exactly what you admire about them, and then see the tiny portions of yourself that fit into that narrative. Remind Yourself of Your Value: This one is never easy, but it’s essential for your personal growth. Of course, we must maintain our relationship with the people we work with, our family and friends, but it’s just as essential to maintaining a healthy relationship with ourselves. An easy and simple way to implement a reminder for yourself is writing down self-affirmations. Affirmations are used as positive statements that can be used to help rewire our thoughts to positive ones. Help Others Taking pride in yourself isn’t always an easy task, but one way to bring positivity into your life is by helping those around you. This doesn’t have to be anything crazy. Simply being there for someone, being a good listener, and helping others in need will help reconfirm your self-appreciation and help you realize that everything you’re feeling now is only temporary. Remember, taking pride in yourself and appreciating yourself isn’t bad. On the contrary, it can be a great thing, perhaps one of the best things, because you are worth your own time, energy, and support. And regardless of whatever negative thoughts may come to mind about yourself, you are worthy for no reason other than the fact that you are alive. With a new year upon us, here are some simple positive changes you can make to your life right now that can help you focus on clearing your mind and putting your health and wellness first.
De-clutter De-cluttering can come with positive benefits. Not only is reorganizing an excellent way to focus and to uplift your mood, but it can also make you do some good in the process. For example, delete your emails, go through your closet and donate your unworn clothes, and throw out that expired food that's been in your fridge for months. De-cluttering will not only help clear up space in your home, but it will give your mind some clarity as well. Carve out some time to exercise every day It doesn't have to be an intense full-body workout. For example, carving out thirty minutes to walk outside or dancing in your living room can help your mindset. Try to find something you enjoy. Start a New Hobby Try a new hobby that will help reduce stress and relax you. For example, try building, cooking, art or writing something in your spare time. Turn off your phone by a certain time in the evening The blue light emitted by your cell phone screen restrains the production of melatonin, the hormone that controls your sleep-wake cycle and keeps you alert, which isn't helpful when trying to sleep. It's time to turn off your phone 30 minutes to an hour before bed to help your brain relax and mentally prepare for a good night's rest. Set a sleep schedule Creating a bedtime routine of going to bed and waking up at a certain time can reduce stress and improve your mood, think more clearly, reduce the risk of heart disease and do better in school and at work. Shut out the negative voices You can start shutting out negative voices by changing your language and how you talk to yourself. Instead of worrying about past mistakes, try to focus on how you can make a positive impact now. Remind yourself that you are good enough and capable of tackling anything. Start practicing self-love today. Don't be afraid to say no Accepting to take on extra work or doing something you don't want to do can reduce your productivity and negatively impact you in the long run. So whatever you're feeling at that moment, don't be afraid to say how you feel or think about it before giving a set answer. Try saying no without feeling guilty, because whatever you choose is the best answer at the moment. Try implementing these into your life today. You'll be surprised at how it impacts you every day. 1/2/2022 0 Comments What did you learn in 2021?It was probably a relief for most people when 2020 ended, and 2021 began. However, throughout the year 2021, there were a lot of ups and downs for many. With the continued spike in COVID-19, new strains coming to light, many celebrity deaths, and some tragic world events, it’s easy to get caught up in all the negative aspects of 2021.
But was 2021 all that bad? It’s easy to reflect on the bad times rather than the good ones, but 2021 taught us some much-needed lessons that will help us in 2022.
After applying more sleep and exercise into my life, I felt like a brand-new person. I could do more, and I had more clarity and more focus.
It might be cheesy but tell the people you love and cherish how much they mean to you. You never know how much time you have with someone, all the feelings you have now can end for you in the blink of an eye. So don’t waste your time wondering what it could have been, and be open and honest with others about how you feel.
It only gives you more pain. Learn to forgive yourself and others and move on from the things that have hurt you. If you allow them to dictate and control your every thought, find a way to vocalize it or put it out to the world so you can let go of the pain it is causing you. With each year comes new experiences, new adventures, and new stories to tell, but with every year comes many new lessons and a lot of things to put into perspective. What did you learn from 2021? It's time to put 2021 behind us and look forward to the new year. Even with the ongoing pandemic, set goals for yourself along with things you would like to accomplish heading into 2022. At the beginning of a new year, many people set New Year's Resolutions for themselves. People set up big things for themselves, but by the end of January, they've already broken many of them. You might know people (or even yourself) that promise to start living a healthier life by creating a workout routine or cutting sugar out of their diet but give up a few weeks into it. You see, the key to creating your goals for the year and keeping your "New Year's Resolutions" is to make them realistic. I can't stress that enough. People often put unrealistic expectations on themselves when creating their resolutions. When you start creating goals for the new year, make sure it's something you can quickly achieve and work towards. Remember, it's the small victories that matter, after all. 1. Start small For example, if you want to be more active, start small. Instead of dedicating yourself to an hour-long workout routine, why not start with finding 15 to 30 minutes a day? Start small so this way, you can push yourself to do more extended amounts of exercise when you're ready. It also doesn't have to be strenuous physical activity. For example, your goal could be to walk more. Find something you like doing and keep pushing yourself little by little. 2. Your goals should be realistic and achievable. Set realistic timelines for yourself. Think about what you hope to achieve by the end of each month or by the end of the year as a whole. For example, if you're starting a new hobby, don't expect yourself to be a professional in a week. Make sure you give yourself some time, and again, be realistic. Examples might look like this:
3. A resolution can be to continue something that brings you joy. Another great way to keep a resolution is to continue doing something you're already doing. For example, if you haven't tried smoking, your resolution could be not to start smoking. If you already go to the gym every day, your resolution can be to continue your workout routine. It's as simple as that. 4. Try to have fun with your New Year Resolutions. Make a list of a couple of books you want to read by the end of 2022. If you're not a reader, your resolution may be to read at least ONE book by the end of the year. Make a list of movies or TV shows you've been putting off that you need to watch before the year's over. When you complete goals, you give yourself a sense of accomplishment and fulfilment. Don't give yourself resolutions that are too difficult or not specific enough. Like I mentioned already, it's the small victories that matter. Don't make them too big or daunting. When making your New Year's Resolutions, make them realistic and as easy as possible; that way, you can succeed at achieving them. Happy New Year from all of us at FABU! 12/13/2021 0 Comments Comfort In Holiday TraditionsThe holidays are a time people anticipate all year. And with holidays come holiday traditions. Holiday traditions allow us to reconnect with our family and make us look forward to eating certain foods or festive activities we only do around this time.
Traditions are unique to each person and family. Some people have similar traditions, like decorating the tree or cuddling up on the couch to watch a Christmas movie together, while some families have their own unique traditions that they look forward to each year. We look towards our annual traditions in our busy and unpredictable lives to provide a sense of familiarity. Each year, you know what to expect, and our holiday traditions can foster a sense of security and comfort. That's why we watch the same holiday movies every year. It wouldn't be Christmas without them. Traditions make us nostalgic about how good we felt when we were younger. As a result, many people continue their holiday traditions well into adulthood and pass them on to their children in hopes of continuing that holiday magic. You can't blame people for craving nostalgia. Traditions have been proven to be good for the brain. Nostalgic feelings can help people experience higher self-esteem, feel more socially connected, and feel more optimistic, generous, and creative. Since people find comfort in annual holiday traditions, sometimes it's hard to adjust when life forces traditions to change. But, in life, nothing can stay the same. Life and people evolve. When this happens, our traditions need to grow as well. We will inevitably change, but as long as the importance and meaning of the holiday is still there, and we have friends and family to enjoy it with, that's all that really matters. So instead, let us embrace and welcome change. So this holiday season, create new memories by cherishing these moments with your loved ones, even if things have changed. From all of us at FABU, have a Merry Christmas and a Happy Holiday Season 12/6/2021 0 Comments The Shoebox ProjectWith Christmas right around the corner, one charity that we are highlighting is The Shoebox Project.
The Shoebox Project's mission is to give gifts to women experiencing homelessness, poverty, or staying in a shelter during the holidays. Approximately 200 people are struggling with homelessness in Windsor alone, and according to the City Of Windsor Homelessness Point In Time Count, 25 percent of them are women. Up until this day, The Shoebox Project has collected and distributed approximately 245,000 shoeboxes and is designed to increase self-esteem and to decrease feelings of loneliness and isolation around the holidays. You can fill a box with items that women need, include a handwritten card and wrap it in your favourite wrapping paper. Due to the ongoing pandemic, you can donate by visiting shoeboxproject.com to build a "virtual shoebox". The process begins by selecting your location, and through the website, you can fill your box with different item options in each category. The categories are something useful, something warm, something luxurious and a gift card of your choice. You can also include a personal note to put that extra special touch. Plus, there is also the option to leave a monetary or a gift card donation. Visit their website and follow the steps to support their cause and help women less fortunate feel valued and appreciated this Christmas. Link: shoeboxproject.com If you would like to donate a physical gift box with essential items, you can bring it to one of these drop off locations around the Windsor-Essex area until DECEMBER 15 Drop-Off LocationsIN HARROW: Jem Aesthetics Address: 9 King St, Harrow, ON N0R 1G0 Hours: Tuesday - Friday: 10 am - 6pm Saturday: 9 am - 3pm IN TECUMSEH: Jem Aesthetics Address: 1825 Manning Rd Suite 400, Tecumseh, ON N8N 2L9 Hours: Tuesday - Friday: 10 am - 6pm Saturday: 9 am - 3pm IN LAKESHORE: Salon Utopia & Med Spa Address: 486 Advance Blvd, Tecumseh, ON N8N 0B8 Hours: Tuesday - Friday: 10 am - 6pm Saturday: 9 am - 3pm IN WINDSOR: Goldstein DeBiase Law Firm Address: 475 Devonshire Rd Suite 200, Windsor, ON N8Y 2L5 Hours: Monday - Friday: 9 am- 5 pm The word “entrepreneur” gets thrown around a lot. But many people use the word freely without really knowing what the true definition of an entrepreneur really is. Although there are some distinct traits that an entrepreneur should have, the entire definition of an entrepreneur is truly up to interpretation at this point.
It’s not just about starting a new business, having new and fresh ideas, or spinning out a company from research. It’s a mindset, or I guess, a way of thinking. Some of the greatest entrepreneurs of all time, Steve Jobs, Bill Gates, and Tony Robbins, all have one thing in common; they never gave up on what they were passionate about. No matter how many times they failed, they got back up and tried again, whether that was with the same idea presented in a different way or a new vision from scratch. Being an entrepreneur starts with an idea, but to truly become an entrepreneur, you must go beyond that and find a way to bring your ideas to life. Not only must you start a business, but you must be willing and ready to deal with the roadblocks, failures and pitfalls that will come your way. Entrepreneurs have a strong burning passion for learning new things and new skills that set them apart. As an entrepreneur, you must take your pre-existing talents and skills and apply them to everything around you. The most important aspect of an entrepreneur is that they are in control of their own destiny. They know their strengths and weaknesses, they are adaptive and flexible, they can tackle problems and work around most issues, and they can always find or forge new paths when it’s necessary. 11/14/2021 0 Comments Learning How To Say NoEveryone has done this. Someone will ask you for a favour you don't want to do, invite you to go or do something you have no interest in attending or take on too much work on your job. Then, you give in by saying yes out of fear of hurting that person's feelings or just don't want to feel guilty for saying ‘no’.
You shouldn't feel guilty for saying ‘no’ if you feel uncomfortable or overwhelmed. So, take some time to evaluate why you want to say ‘no’ and evaluate your priorities. In life, some obligations require your attendance or participation, but sometimes, you need to take a step back and think about whether something is worth your time and energy. An important thing to ask yourself is: Is this worth my time and energy? After a long week, will I feel more burnt out or anxious by doing this? Sometimes we don't want to go out on the weekends, and we need that time to relax and recharge. On the other hand, if it's work-related, you may need to tell your boss that you need more time to complete specific projects or can't take on anymore due to burnout. Next, evaluate who's asking? Will the person asking appreciate it and would return the favour? Usually, we feel like saying ‘no’ to certain people because we've been screwed over or left disappointed by that person in the past. If this is the case, let them know. Don't beat around the bush or create excuses - if you don't want to do something, the best thing to do is be upfront about it and kindly decline. If you already feel overwhelmed, don't be afraid to say that you would rather spend time decompressing or letting them know you already have other tasks to do. Be honest while being courteous by saying something like: “Thanks for the invite, but I’m going to stay home tonight” or “I would like to help, but I’m taking some time to myself after a stressful week.” If someone asks you something that you feel uncertain about, don't be afraid to tell them you need some time to think it over and let them know later. Overall, you shouldn't feel guilty for saying no if you feel like that is the best response. Accepting to take on something you don't want to put energy into can reduce your productivity and negatively impact you. Whatever you're feeling at that moment, don't be afraid to say how you really feel. Try saying ‘no’ without feeling guilty, because whatever you choose is the best answer at the moment. Just remember to be polite when you decline. 11/8/2021 0 Comments Epilepsy AwarenessThere are over 330,000 Canadians that live with epilepsy, and one in ten Canadians will experience one seizure in their lifetime. Since November is Epilepsy Awareness Month, we thought we would share some information about epilepsy and how you can help someone when they may be having a seizure.
If someone has one seizure, it doesn't necessarily mean they have epilepsy. Epilepsy is diagnosed when multiple seizures occur. According to Epilepsy Canada, epilepsy and seizures result from abnormal circuit activity in the brain. In addition, brain development, brain inflammation, physical injury or infection can lead to seizures and epilepsy, but for up to 50% of patients diagnosed with epilepsy, their cause is unknown. If you see someone having a seizure, make sure not to panic. If you see someone having any type of seizure, here are some general steps to help:
When most people think of a seizure, they think of a generalized tonic-clonic seizure, also called a grand mal seizure. In this type of seizure, the person may cry out, fall, shake or jerk, and become unaware of what's going on around them. Here are things you can do to help someone who is having this type of seizure:
When someone is having a seizure, never do any of the following things:
This Epilepsy Awareness Month, spend some time educating yourself about epilepsy and learning how to help someone when they may be having a seizure with epilepsy first aid. It's always good to be prepared. Sources: https://www.epilepsy.ca/ Seizure First Aid | Epilepsy | CDC We tend to think about personal development as an ongoing process, like a river flowing continuously. But if you are swimming in that river every so often, you have to take a deep breath and reanalyze your plans and what your next step is.
Whether you’re starting out in a new career, chasing your next promotion, or looking to strengthen your relationship with yourself and others, implementing a personal development plan (PDP) will be very effective in your growth! While we often go on throughout life basically on autopilot, sometimes it’s worth it to take time to re-evaluate. Follow these steps below to help propel your future!
Hard questions to answer, but if you separate them into a step by step process, it can help you thoroughly analyze what you want out of life! 2. Prioritize You know what’s most important in your every day versus what can wait. So learn to prioritize in your day what is vital for you to do and what can wait. For example, working on that assignment due tonight is more important than binging that new Netflix show. 3. Track Your Progress Things can move fast or slowly; whichever it is, it’s ok! Don’t rush it; take the time to perfect it. Track your everyday process with whatever you want to focus on, whether it’s your career, relationships or self-care; track all of it because even the most minor accomplishments are big ones. 4. Set reminders Don’t sell yourself short. Set reminders on your phone to keep you on track with what you need to get done involving your development plan. And if those reminders don’t work on the phone, try writing it down in a journal, notepad, or task list. 5. Take it easy Following a development plan or any plan isn’t simple, and if you fall off, don’t beat yourself up over it. Instead, take it easy on yourself and remember that any accomplishment is a big one! Follow these steps and become aligned with your purpose and what you want the most out of life! Having a plan in place will help keep you on track with your wants and needs. We carry in us an insatiable desire for more. Desire for more money, more friends, a bigger house, nicer car. It's natural to want more and desire more, but when you get into the mindset of needing to get more, it makes you feel empty and look for other ways to fulfill yourself.
The wish for happiness exists within every single human being; however, the concept of happiness varies depending on the development of each individual. The desire for more, bigger and better is never-ending, and that doesn't just mean material things; we are always looking for the long-lasting emotional high as well. But, often, this is the wrong way to go about it. Think about it. Happiness isn't something that we chase; it's something that happens naturally, and this is why the pursuit of happiness is entirely flawed. We have this conception that happiness means joyfulness and excitement, but humans aren't meant to stay joyful or excited at all times. So if one is focused on pursuing happiness, even momentarily achieved happiness, what is one to do when these feelings wax and wane? It can set you up for a trap when you begin to realize that all of your life cannot be joyful and exciting at all times. Before you question that, I'm not saying you can't have moments of happiness; of course, you will, but you will also have moments of sadness, fear and pain. Just like any other human, you feel many emotions. The thing that is missing is being entirely in the present moment with our thoughts. We get so caught up with the idea of, "In the future, I'll be happy, I'll be happier once I get a better paying job," by doing this, we are not allowing ourselves to realize that usually in the present moment, most things are joyful and calm. It's time to reimagine happiness and give a new definition of what that word means. Genuine happiness is when we can go within and work through all of the things that are holding us back. It also correlates to other stuff like cultivating gratitude, embracing all feelings that arise with curiosity and compassion, developing the capacity to create a meaningful narrative of our life, and developing enough intimacy with ourselves that we can engage in relationships with others. 10/17/2021 0 Comments Connecting With Nature“Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.” --Albert Einstein
Fall is a beautiful time of year. It's a time where the heat of the summer fades away, and the crisp chill in the air comes in to create perfect sweater weather. So before the brisk winter cold kicks in, take advantage of this weather by going outside and connecting with nature. If you have hiking trails nearby or a natural park, take a morning or afternoon stroll down the trails. Not only will it allow you to get your body moving and your heart pumping, but it will also allow you to be present with yourself. Use this exercise as an opportunity to disconnect from technology. Take this time to turn off your phone for a while, live in the moment, and reconnect with your body and mind. For example:
It doesn't have to be a race; it's about the journey. Again, it's about disconnecting and being present with yourself and your surroundings, along with quieting your mind from the hectic motions of your daily routine. If you want to enhance your experience, why not listen to some relaxing music, have one of your favourite drinks at hand, or write about what you are seeing and feeling in a journal? Spending some time outside and in nature brings us a state of mental and emotional clarity that relieves stress. It's been proven that spending time in nature creates positive emotions and reconnects us with ourselves. So before it becomes too cold outside, take advantage of the fall weather by spending some time outdoors and connecting with nature. 10/11/2021 0 Comments Photography 101 for dummiesInspiration can come at any time and any moment, and I can’t even begin to express how many times I’ve seen something and thought, “damn, I wish I brought my camera with me.”
Once you get into the art of photography, the options are endless when it comes to creating a digital masterpiece, but first things first, you need to know how to control the beast and tame it in the way you like it. Yes, I’m talking about your camera. There are so many ways you can create a beautiful shot, and depending on what you’re shooting, there are a few basic skills every beginning photographer should have in their rule handbook.
The easiest way to solve this is to pay attention to the direction and softness of the light. If the light is too harsh, you could get bad shadows going across your subject, which is especially a problem for portrait photography. If your light is coming in and creating an unflattering look on your subject, see what you can do to move around your light source, whether in a studio or outside, wait until you can see your subject correctly through your viewfinder.
That’s why it’s best to be selective and remember quality over quantity. Sure, you can take over 2000 photos over the course of eight hours at a wedding, but a lot of the time, only about 500 turn out great, and that’s ok. So promise your clients quality over quantity.
ISO: Controls the camera’s sensitivity to light. Shutter Speed: Controls how long the shutter stays open when you take a picture. Aperture: This is the opening of your lens and controls how much light gets through the camera sensor. If you can apply all of this into your daily manual, I promise your work will start being more consistent, more clear and you’ll be proud of yourself! 2021 has been quite the year. Between lockdowns, vaccination roll-outs, an election with political division, it's understandable how people might feel uneasy, scared and unhopeful about where we are heading coming out of the pandemic.
With all that's going on, let's not forget to be thankful for some things that we may take for granted. Being Connected Throughout this pandemic, a big thing to be thankful for is that it's 2021, meaning that we have technology that keeps us connected and busy. There's a lot of anger and fear being spread online. Still, one giant plus for always being connected through social media and numerous devices is that it allows us to communicate with family and friends when we aren't allowed to see each other. Also, because of technology:
Imagine if this pandemic happened before the early 2000s, before iPhones, Netflix and all the other apps and devices we have at our disposal. People would feel even more uncertain and disconnected than they already are. Family and Friends When people are losing loved ones due to COVID, take a moment to be thankful for the friends and family you have in your life and cherish the relationships you have. The lockdown has put a new perspective on how we view our relationships, so we shouldn't take time with our loved ones for granted. Employment Unfortunately, some businesses had to close during the pandemic, which meant many people lost their jobs. If you are still employed or recently got a new job after losing your last one, take some time to be thankful for your current employment status, as many people may have lost work during this time. Finding new ways to be self-sufficient During the pandemic, there was a spike in DIY projects. Since people had more time on their hands, what better way to pass the time than to catch up on fixing things around the house or building a fence in your backyard? This time also saw a spike in cooking and baking as people tried out new recipes to cook for themselves and their families. It's this type of self-sufficiency that should continue long after the pandemic is over. The little things Don't forget to be thankful for the little things, which can include:
This Thanksgiving, take a moment to be grateful for the small things you may take for granted daily. Especially in times of uncertainty, take a moment to remember the good things you have going on. It's never too early to start planning. With family members getting vaccinated and looser restrictions on get-togethers, you might be planning on hosting the Thanksgiving you never got to have last year.
With that said, here are some tips on how to plan ahead for the festivities this year to make sure you have a game plan for whatever you're planning this year. 1. To Have Thanksgiving or Not to have Thanksgiving, that is the question. Before starting any planning, know where you stand this year for Thanksgiving. If you're usually the host, do you want to host this year? If you're usually the guest, will you attend the entire festivity, or would you rather have a quick pop in? Know what you want to do and discuss it with other members to understand what they would like to do to ensure everyone is on the same page and to set expectations. 2. Don't be afraid to say no. If you don't feel comfortable having Thanksgiving this year or feel more comfortable staying at home, don't be afraid to skip it this year, given that the pandemic is still going on. Also, don't be afraid to have a small Thanksgiving with your closest family or friends, given the circumstances. 3. Spread out the preparations over a few days Instead of scrambling to get the dishes, tables, extra seating and décor ready the night before, why not dedicate a few days to getting everything you need? Then, spread out your tasks and complete them in the days leading up to the big day. This includes making a grocery list and getting items well ahead of time. And with that said… 4. Try to prepare as many meals ahead of time as you can, and don't be afraid to buy pre-made meals. Cooking a turkey is time-consuming. A lot of people tend to cook the turkey and other oversized items the day of. As a result, they spend most of the day in the kitchen and not enough time enjoying company. If you're one of these people, try to prepare as much food as you can a day or two before and put it in the oven or zap it in the microwave when it's almost time to eat. Don't be afraid to cook and carve that turkey a day ahead and heat it the next day in the oven. It will still turn out delicious, and you can enjoy your company. Also, don't be afraid to buy pre-made meals to save time, like purchasing a pie instead of making one from scratch. This year, try making things easy on yourself by organizing and preparing things ahead of time. This will make Turkey Day go by smoother and gives you and your family enough time to enjoy your day. Most of us already know this, but it is essential for our inner happiness when we fall in love with ourselves. In addition, it can help us be successful in other relationships and help us connect with the person you want the world to see.
When you can fall in love with yourself, you will receive more love in return. When you exude love and confidence, you will attract people in your life that also have the same zest for living. So the cycle is clear, and it all starts with one thing, falling madly and deeply in love with yourself. But where does self-love come from? How do you build it? How do you work through the things dictating your everyday life and holding you back from true happiness? 1. Be Kind To Yourself It seems so simple but can be one of the hardest parts of self-love to master. Unfortunately, we are growing up in a society that tells us how to look, feel, and act. The way to fix this? Take back your power. Whatever that may be - negative outlook on life, feeling empty, lost, or unconfident, take your control back! Learn to catch yourself when you fall into negative self-talk and make a conscious effort to change those words into positive reaffirming comments. 2. Change Your Self Talk The way you talk to yourself affects your mind and your overall being, and a lot of the time, negative self-talk can become a self-fulfilling prophecy. It’s ok to hold yourself to a high standard and feel the emotions you feel within the moment, but it’s not good to get stuck into that mindset and let it dictate your everyday life. 3. Surround Yourself With Supportive People Remember that you come first in your life You are your number one priority, and having supportive people around you reminds you that it is a good thing to set yourself up with a positive mindset in life. In addition, creating positive and healthy relationships in your life can remind you that there is good in others and that good is present in your life. 4. Push Yourself Getting out of your comfort zone is the key to happiness. When you get out of your comfort zone, you allow yourself to be free of your fears of failure. Pushing past those fears can bring a new and exciting aspect to your life that you once dreamed of that now is a reality. 5. Give Back When you’re checking out, and the cashier asks you if you want to donate $1.50 to a cause, do it. It’s such a small gesture, but it can change the whole aspect of your life. When you give back, you feel like you helped someone during their time of need, but you realise that helping others could potentially be your life purpose, and when we find our life purpose, everything else falls into place. These are just some small steps you can take to start to fall in love with yourself and your life. Life can have its ups and downs, but we need to focus on those ups and acknowledge the downs. Then, even when we fall, we can get back up and start over. There is no playbook to life; it’s what we want it to be. Failure doesn’t need to be looked at as a bad thing. Sometimes, the best course of action is to let it be and allow what is supposed to happen, happen. When we get into the habit of labelling things as good or bad, we tell our brain that something negative happened, besides allowing them to process that event and move past it.
For example, when something goes wrong, you’ll most likely focus on making it better besides allowing it to merely float through existence. Good and bad mentality tends to pit your memories against each other, and as someone told me recently, “Comparison is the theft of joy.” Of course, you can learn from the bad experiences, but you can also gain wisdom from the good ones. Attaching a description designated to an emotion can increase your chances of unreliable narratives. Now, it’s no secret that some things that happen are bad, and some experiences may feel unequivocally good or bad, but this all has to do with your approach. Letting life float without labelling things as good or bad allows you to focus on what’s important - you. |
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December 2023
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